Friday, 21 January 2011

A bit of comfort eating

The car is ordered! I should get it 1st week of March and I'm very excited. It'll look like this:
From Raising Seth
You can't tell from this picture but it's huge - I'm a little daunted by it but when I did the test drive it was so easy to drive and it's got rear parking sensors so hopefully I'll be able to park it!!!

We now have a tray for Seth's wheelchair.
From Raising Seth
It'll make a big difference when we're out and about because I will be able to put sensory stuff on it and put meals on it. It had to be adjusted though because when the engineer tried to attach the tray we discovered that the company had measured it up wrong so didn't fit. So he had to drill more holes and move the screws. Plus the screws hadn't been recessed so stick out and are quite sharp so Seth could easily catch his finger on one. So this is just a temporary measure and another, properly made tray has been ordered (good grief!)

Yesterday I had another fit of baking and attempted a victoria sponge.
From Raising Seth
Yes it really is that flat - it didn't rise AT ALL. I still stuck jam in it and then preceded to work my way through it. Seth's only been at school 2 weeks but it feels longer and what with his poor sleeping pattern it really caught up with me yesterday. I'm not someone who is good with routine and the knowledge of the daily routine that is ahead of me started to depress me. When we decided to start a family I knew that kids did incur some routine but with Seth I am rigorous in repeating the getting up routine, the getting dressed routine, signing and using objects of reference etc etc. My skin used to literally crawl as I patiently fed Seth and tried to help him feed himself. I wanted to leap up and scream. Instead I have doggedly added more and more repetition as I've seen Seth respond to it. And I've gotten used to moving at Seth's pace and these routines are my way of expressing my love for Seth - giving him the best opportunity I can to pick up skills for eventual independence. But yesterday it just got to me a little. Plus what has been sustaining me is the plan to go to America this year on holiday. But after looking at the cost of flights I can't see it happening this year. Also, the realisation that now that Seth is at school (rather than private nursery) all of my annual leave from work will have to be used to cover the school holidays. So whereas before I could take off a day when Seth was at nursery and take some time for me (or sometimes Craig and I would take off a day together) that's not going to be possible anymore. That's hard to get my head around! I know that all parents must feel like this but that doesn't mean I have to like it! BUT THEN

I went to my new gym on the way home from work this evening. I did a 30 minute run (interspersed with walking!!) then (and I don't mean to rub this in readers) chilled out in the jacuzzi and sauna. & you know I'm feeling much better about everything!! I can take time out for myself and at least my money is going to some lovely things :)